The crash on Mother's Day 2012

On Mother's day at about 3am I got into a wreck with a drunk driver.  He came barrelling around a curved off-ramp at freeway speeds.  I moved as far to the right as I could and he slammed straight into me.  He was driving a small older model Datsun pickup truck.  These Crown Victorias, (God save the Queen, and me!), are like tanks compared to that little ol' pickup.  My car stayed there and he went spinning around back the other way!  His truck was smoking as he got out and walked passed the side of my car.  I said "are you all right?" and he immediately took off running into the night.  I got out and walked over to the truck where I saw that his passenger was hanging half way out of the truck with a bleeding head and his legs all cramped up under the dashboard.  Some people pulled over and a guy pulled him out and laid him down by the side of the road.  The police and paramedics showed up pretty quickly and I think he was o.k.  I felt relatively o.k.  The funny thing is that my airbag never went off.  It seemed to me, and I imagined this in my mind, that God put his hand there between me and the steering wheel and softened the blow.

Taxi Tips

Here's some tips to make taking taxis smoother.

1. Give the cab room to pull over. We can see you. We are looking for you, so you don't have to stand in the middle of the road jumping up and down flailing your arms in the air. Legally we are required to pull out of the traffic lane to the curb or some other safe area, so once you see us pulling over, move back so we can pull to the curb.

2. Sit in the back seat. That's where you are supposed to sit in a taxi. Of course unless there are too many people, fill up the back first.

3. Tipping. It's a common practice to tip a cab driver. Tip more if they provide exceptional service. Tipping well motivates a driver to better service.

4. Be polite. You may need special services from a driver so if you are rude, do think we will go out of our way for you? Instances include, leaving things behind in the cab, needing the cab to wait, needing the cab to return at a certain time, scheduling, getting the driver's personal number for quick service, favors, etc.

5. Be ready to go. When you call or hail a cab, be ready to get in the cab and leave. The dispatcher may say 15-20 minutes, but a cab could be coming available right around the corner. Making us wait loses us money and I have pulled away from customers who were not ready to go in a reasonable amount of time.

6. Don't call multiple cab services for one pickup. If you call several and take the first one who gets there, problems arise. If it happens repeatedly, the dispatcher will "black list" your number and calls from you won't be dispatched, and you'll have a harder and harder time getting cabs. It's also just rude to the other drivers who waste their time and gas to drive to get you.

7. Don't argue with us to turn off the meter. If a driver is o.k. to do that he will agree to do it, but it's illegal and can bring a fine.

8. Don't argue to overfill the car. There is a big fine for that.

9. Don't puke inside the car. Tell us to pull over. At least get it out the window!

10. You are paying for a service so you are the boss. Don't let the driver take you a way you don't want to go. Remember the number of the cab you were in in case you leave something behind.

I don't play that

One night I picked up two guys from one of the bars in town. They were a local run so it wasn't going to be that great of a fare. They were really drunk. One started asking me questions and then said, "when was the last time you were cold cocked?", which means "sucker punched"
"never"
"why not?"
"because I have this." I pulled out a long metal flash light from under my seat.
Then he said, "What if I blast you right now?"

At this point I just pulled over about fifty yards from a police van.
"Get the hell out", I said as I stepped out of the cab holding the flashlight in my hand. I opened the back door and instructed the guys to get out immediately. They didn't move.
"Aw we were just kidding", one said.
"I'm not kidding; get the fuck out of my cab right now"

Then I yelled over to the police van saying, "hey these guys won't get out of my cab!" I don't mess around. I'm not going to joke about attacking cab drivers. They can walk.

Finally they said "ok, ok, we're leaving!", but still were just lingering looking at me. I kicked the back door shut and yelled,
"Then what are you still doing here?", I snapped, "get to stepping!", and they walked off into the shadows....

Choose your boobs

Night. Cool air. Cruising up and down busy boulevards. Everywhere you glance, beautiful girls. Neon signs light up the night. Crowds lining up in front of the hottest bars and clubs. Taco shops full of people with the drinking munchies.

This was the environment I was immersed in when four cute young girls hailed my cab from the side of the street. I pulled close and they piled in. Blondes, brunettes, redhead, the whole spectrum. We were off into the grid of the Pacific Beach streets. They needed to go to Mission Valley and this ride was going to be a nice one. It was going to run them about $25 I estimated.

They were in a very good mood and buzzed from the alcohol consumed that night. Giggles, laughter, and joking abounded. The girl sitting in the middle back seat was the most talkative and started telling me about a cab ride she had taken with several friends where the driver gave them a free ride for showing off their boobs. She went on and on. She said one of the girls let the driver fondle her bare tit all the way home. Then she told me the tale of a certain ride with a gay friend of hers who gave the driver a blowjob on the way home for a free ride. "Will you turn off the meter if we show you our tits?"
"Ladies, I've seen tits. Tonight I'm working for cash."
Pleading, coaxing, begging to show bare breasts. They must be really strapped for cash I was thinking. I wasn't going to relent. Now, I'm a red-blooded all-american man. Of course I wanted to see the tits, but, I was going to get paid.

We approached their destination, about two blocks away.., "Now will you turn off the meter if I flash you". Well two blocks isn't going to hurt. "O.k., I guess so", so off the meter goes. We pulled up to the curb. The talkative one in back moved forward, hands on the t-shirt neckline, ready and poised to pull down and expose.
"Wait!", I said, and all is quiet, moving my gaze from her to the girl sitting in front, a super cute asian girl with black shiny hair in bangs with two HUGE round breasts. "I want to see hers instead."

Her friends all started laughing, saying, "Yeah, show yours, yours are the best anyway!" Somewhat embarrassed, but apparantly up to the challenge she said, "o.k., I guess so" She turned sideways to face me, held her left hand up and pulled one side of her black shirt down to briefly flash one huge perfectly round boob, and back it went. I did get a good, although quick look. We all had a laugh, they paid me, minus the $2 boob savings and I turned around and headed back into the night, back to the beach.

Macho Man

I picked up a Mexican couple from the bar Good Time Charlie's around closing time and started out of the parking lot. The guy was of average height but with an amazingly large round belly and was in the back seat. The lady, in the front, was attractive and each were in their late 30's I'd guess. This guy was pretty hammered and the woman did the talking at first. The lady told me her address, which was in Pacific Beach. This was when I had first started out and I wasn't familiar with the location of where they needed to go. "Do you know where that is?", she asked.
"No, I'm not sure that I do. Why don't you just direct me as we go.", I said.

She started to tell me directions when this guy piped up angrily, "That's not proper! He is our driver! He is the man and he'll take care of us!
She spoke the beginning of our directions to her house so I was able to start off in the right direction.
"Shut up!", he yelled at her. "Don't speak to him like that!"
"Sir, it's o.k., I'm still learning all the streets in this area, I don't mind if she tells me", I said.
She gave me another turn to take.
"I said that's not proper! He is our driver! He will take care of the situation!", said the fat gut guy.
"Sir, really it's o.k. I need her to tell me the directions. I don't know where you live."
"I'm so sorry", she said
"Goddamit! This is bullshit! I don't want you talking to him like that. If he is driving us, he will take care of us!"

At this point I started ignoring this guy and kept asking her the proper directions. He started getting angrier. This line of conversation went on in variations like this for several minutes. Finally he said, "Fuck this shit!, let me out of this cab!"
"What?", I asked
"Let me the fuck out of this cab! This is bullshit and I won't put up with this!"
I slowed down...
"You want out of the cab?", I said
"Yes!"
"You want out right here?"
"Yes!"
I came to a quick stop in the middle of the dark street.
"Then get out."
He opened the rear door and got out. I sped off with the girl still in the front seat.

I looked in the rear view mirror and saw the guy yelling and shaking his fist at me! I just chuckled to myself.
"I'm so sorry about him." He gets like that when he gets drunk.
"Are you going to be o.k.?", I asked.
"Yes, I'll be fine. The place is just up here." It turns out it was only about a block and a half from where I dropped the guy off. I was a little nervous of my stop being so close. I didn't want this asshole running up on me while I was stopped there trying to collect my fare.
"Oh, I'm so sorry but he has all the money. I don't have any to pay you." Can I take your number and I promise I'll send it to you."
"Don't you have any money at all?"
"No I don't"
"Well, alright, I guess. Here is my number", and I jotted down my info for her, let her out and drove off. It wasn't a very large fare, but I never got the money.

Have the guts to be nice

I was cruising down 5th avenue in Hillcrest late one quiet evening. As I was passing the bar called Nu-Nu's I noticed a young good looking couple standing on the corner looking as if they were having a heated argument. I passed on by but I was trying to follow my intuition, my hunches lately, and I got a vibe that told me to go back around the corner and drive slowly by the couple. I did so and as I was rounding the corner next to the couple, staring at them, waiting for whatever I was supposed to be waiting for, there was a guy crossing the street in front of me, so I stopped. He looked somewhat raggedy and was wearing an old blanket around his shoulders. He waived at me, so I stopped. He approached and asked for a ride. I said, get on in. My gut insincts have generally served me very well. I don't discriminate by the looks of people because I've had very good fares from people I'm sure some wouldn't ever pick up.

He got in and wanted to go just a few blocks. He started telling me about his crappy day. Earlier this evening he had found out his live-in girlfriend had been cheating on him for awhile with another man. He had just left her house and was going to try to find a friend to stay with. He was going on about how bad he felt and how shitty everything was and how they had been together for a long time. I said, "hey, well maybe this happening is a new door opening for you and an opportunity for you to find a good girl, the one you're really supposed to be with."
He said, "Oh, brother! Thank you so much for saying that! I've been hoping all day someone was going to say something cool to me. Back in my neighborhood where I live no one ever says anything cool like that. Thanks a lot."

His response surprised me and made me think that he was just the one I was supposed to pick up to pass on some good vibes. It made me remember what an impact our words have on each other and how we can influence our world by just one positive sentence or word. It's easy to get caught up in the little discouragements and frustrations of our days. I thought I don't have it so bad right now, really. Try to say a nice word to someone today. Even just telling someone they are doing a good job will really perk them up. I tried this with a fast food clerk and a bank teller and was surprised at how much they lit up. It makes you feel good too.

She felt so free!

One night at about 2am, I was driving down Riviera Dr. in the Pacific Beach area. I'm always scanning the side of the road for passengers. I saw a lady walking by herself. Now I never do this, but for some reason I pulled over to her even though she hadn't waived me down or even looked at me. I just had a feeling she might want a ride. So I asked her and sure enough she said she did want a ride. She climbed in the back and I turned to look at her and said, "hi". She looked to be in her mid-forties I'd imagine. She had blond hair and blue eyes and a nice figure from what I could tell. She was all bundled up in skiing style polyester overalls, a turtle-neck shirt and a beanie. It was a cold night.

She said she wanted to go to Hoboken, which is a pizza joint that stays open late. I started on our way. She wanted to go there and eat a slice or two and have a beer. Then she wanted me to come and pick her up when she was done, so I gave her my card. We exchanged some polite chit chat and then she said that if it weren't so cold, she'd flash me. I told her, "I'll turn the heat on, on the way back then!", thinking I was funny, not really expecting that. We pulled up to the place and I let her out.

About an hour later, I received a call from her. She was ready to be picked up. As we were headed back, I glanced in the back and saw something very surprising. She had undone the top of her overalls and pulled her shirt all the way up over her tits! She wasn't wearing a bra. She was lightly cupping them and running her middle fingers underneath them. I so calmly and casually asked, "Hey, what are you doing back there?"
"Oh, I just like to do this. It feels nice. It makes me feel so free."
"Oh, o.k., that's cool" I said as I proceeded to drive her home. I glanced back a few times on the way and they were still hangin right out there the whole time. They were a nice medium size and firm and plump looking and I was stoked to be checking those babies out.

We pulled up into her apartment parking lot which was a part of a huge complex called the Bay View apartments, which was bathed in the cold glow of the security lighting fixtures. There was no one around to be seen or heard at all. I turned around in my seat to look at her. She was caressing them and asked me, "Do you want to touch them?"
"Yeah, sure", I said. She leaned forward and I reached into the back and proceeded to lift each one alternately up and down, cupping them with my hands, like I was judging their weight. Then lightly pinching and twisting her nipples, like using an etch-a-sketch, then squeezed them like I was testing for a ripe tomatoes at the market. At this point I felt a little bolder and asked, "Can I kiss them?"
"Sure, go ahead", she said. So I leaned a little further back and kissed each one of them and gently nibbled and sucked on them!

Let me tell you, I was so bored this night before this episode, that now I thought, where the hell am I?... the Twilight Zone, Penthouse magazine, or what !!? After a minute or so, I imagine, she backed away a little and I stopped. I'm a polite guy so I thought I'd offer to return a favor and asked, "Do you want to see anything of mine?" At this point she got nervous and started moving to get out. She paid me and quickly exited the back of the car with her breasts still fully exposed in the pale moonlight. I said, "Are you sure? I could come up to your place or something"
"No, no, that's o.k., I have a lot to do right now", which seemed an odd thing at 3am.
"Thanks, you have my card if you need a ride sometime!", I shouted as she scurried away towards the building, pulling her shirt back down. She would eventually end up calling me again in about a week; but that's another story...

Driving tips

*Don't speed
*Use your blinker
*Go with the flow of traffic, and generally match it. That's better than going too slow if you're merging.
*At an intersection the car on the right has the right of way